Parking in South Perth? You gotta read all the signs

The Boss,

Parking Enforcement Services,

PO Box 7753,
Cloisters Square,

Perth 6850

28/05/2013

Cc: CEO, City of South Perth,

Civic Centre
Cnr Sandgate St and South Tce
South Perth WA 6151.

Dear Sir/Madam,

Please find enclosed copies of my parking ticket of 24/5/2013, with accompanying parking fine received on the same day, while my Subaru B 451 was parked behind the Windsor Hotel, South Perth.

It is, of course, of little interest to you in Parking Enforcement that I often visit this South Perth precinct when in the city. It is one of my favourite spots and on this occasion I did as I have always done, walked along the foreshore with a friend, chatting, going over our business relationship, discussing the odd dilemma, then we drank coffee, ate small morsels and finished off with a sorbet at the ice-cream shop. All in all, a solid and constructive meeting in a delightful setting.

In all my years of business meetings in this part of glorious South Perth, I have never once received a parking ticket. Until now. And you can imagine my irritation, because I was just around the corner at the time the ticket was slapped on my windscreen and as soon as I discovered the slim slip of incrimination and ridicule, my first thought was: Where the hell is that guy? He can’t be far. He’s made a mistake. It can’t be true. Not me, a parking fine, never. But, he was nowhere to be seen. (I assumed he was a man and I apologise for any perceived sexism in my response.) 

Then I looked closely at the ticket and the notice. Oh, yes, Dear Parking Enforcement Servicer, those two tiny pieces of paper told me a story that made a tiny part of my brain sing a small song.

Just take a look at this:

 

Not sure if you can tell from the big picture, so let’s take a closer look:

 

Note the expiry time.

Now note the breach time.

Indeed, the breach time is some time before the expiry time. Now this could be explained by the failing eyesight of the parking enforcement officer, or his inability to see beyond the immediate. My guess: His eyes brush the dashboard and fail to pick up the ticket lying just off the dashboard in front of the steering wheel. Let me explain with a photograph, which I took with the two slips in position on the car’s dash.

 

There you have it. Let’s not be too hard on the officer. I’m sure his heart and iPad are in the right place.

Given I have sent a copy of this letter to the City, I would now like to wish you both an excellent winter.

And, South Perth, may you and your City continue to shine,

Jon Doust

A regular visitor

With a promise never to leave his car unticketed

And to ensure a more central placement in the future.

A response from the aforementioned Parking Enforcement Services was received. This fearsome body sent me a letter saying my appeal had been rejected, no reason given, but then it generously supplied me with a list of unacceptable reasons.

Here they are. 

 

I, of course, sent it all to Inside cover.